Interviewer: "Do you think you can handle a variety of tasks?" Applicant: "I should say so. I've had nine totally different jobs in the past five months."

The stern faced Personnel Officer told an applicant that they needed an individual who is totally responsible. "I sure qualify then." replied the applicant. "Everywhere I've worked, whenever something went wrong, I was responsible."

"I see under 'Personal Traits' you have "Self-Starter" listed," said the Human Resources Officer. "Why is that important to you?" "It seems to me that if more employees were self-starters, then the bosses wouldn't have to be cranks," the almost selected candidate replied.

The Personal Officer was concluding the interview with the applicant for an entry level position in the Social Security Administration: "Well, Mr. Samuels, everything seems to be in order. I think we can start you working here next week." "Great!" the man replied. "I've always wanted to be a civil serpent."

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